i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
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