he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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