I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
