did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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