Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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