"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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