we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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