I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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