once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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