I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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