I could have mohawked her pubes.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
can u get pink eye on your cock?
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
