Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
