I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Randomize
