You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
