Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
i black out too much to be "responsible"
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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