He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
