So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I just want to make out with him forever
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
How does it feel to date your dad?
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
