I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
A+ Viking dick
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize