My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
