Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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