I'm going to rape someone's good day.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
