rhymes with "ouble enetration"
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
