shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
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