we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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