its not stalking. its research.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
