dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
you win again, gameday.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Randomize
