Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
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