would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
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