Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
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