then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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