So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
