can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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