yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
