I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
