Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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