Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
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