so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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