Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
