Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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