Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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