A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
