Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
