I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
