I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
i just found a plastic monkey in my sweatshirt pocket
Umm I had a plastic mermaid in my pants......
Really
You win
you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Randomize
