i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
