What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
