PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
