afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Randomize
