friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
