I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
